People I Want to Punch in the Throat

Over the weekend, I read People I Want to Punch in the Throat by Jen Mann. I wasn’t following her blog before, but I am now. I read a lot of heavier memoirs and non-fiction, so it’s nice to break it up with some tales from bloggers and PIWTPITT was a quick, easy read that was perfect for our road trip to a wedding this weekend. In sum, I liked it. If you want to see reviews, check out Goodreads.

I’m not a “ranter” by nature, but in honor of the book, I’d like to share with you a few people I’d like to punch in the throat.

1. Anyone that works for Yahoo!

Even typing that exclamation mark at the end ticks me off. How self-righteous (company-righteous?) of them to declare excitement anytime anyone mentions their whack internet corporation. Do I add punctuation after their imposed punctuation? If I as a question about Yahoo!, will it look like I am frantically asking a question about Yahoo!?

I use my old yahoo email address for retailer spam, and I check it for coupons here and there. The only thing I hate more than their sorry excuse for news stories is myself when I find myself clicking on that garbage. Not only that, but I had yahoo spambots TEXTING ME several years ago, before I got a different number (unrelated). Spam texts! You know that excited (or irritated) feeling you get when you hear your text tone? All that emotion wasted over a spambot! Ugh.

2. People who write articles about scientific studies that prove abso-fucking-lutely nothing

Cheerful? Depressed? The Season in Which You Were Born Might Hold The Key” and “The Size of Your Engagement Ring Can Predict a Divorce, Study Says” were a couple of the off-the-mark headlines I’ve regretted clicking lately. I can say with a level of certainty that the writers pumping this crap out don’t believe it themselves. It’s clickbait that pawns itself off as being life enhancing, educational, and doctor recommended.

Coincidence is not correlation is not causation, Y’ALL.

3. Oscar Pistorius and anyone that kept him from getting charged with murder

I don’t follow the news too closely, because sometimes I have a hard time dealing with all the bad things in the world that aren’t my business. But, runners and triathletes always look to disabled athletes to motivate themselves and others, so when I saw he was in the headlines, I was intrigued. It only took this recount from Pistorius’ exgirlfriend, his history of domestic violence, and Pistorius’s recount of the events of the night of the crime–along with my personal experiences with domestic violence–before it was very clear to me what likely happened that night. SO FLIPPIN’ DUMB that he’s likely to get 10 months in prison and house arrest to a MANSION. for terrorizing a woman, then murdering her. Incredible.

Denise Brown, Sister-in-law of famed footballer and murderer O.J. Simpson, wrote a poignant article about Domestic Violence in response.

I’ll leave the ranting and punching people in the throat to Jen Mann. I’m gonna go meditate.

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