The last few leap years have come and gone without me noticing, but this year, my kindergartner’s class is celebrating the special day with frog-related activities. You learn something new every day: leap year day had acquired a mascot.

Boiling Frogs

Speaking of frogs, have you ever heard of that old boiling frogs apologue? First off, I do not condone boiling frogs. Don’t try this at home, kids.

It goes like this: if you were to put a frog and boiling water, the frog would feel the immense heat and imminent danger and immediately jump out. Yet, the saying suggests that if instead, you were to place the frog in room temperature water and slowly increase the heat, it would stay there, acclimating to the warmth until it boiled to death.

Folks use this as a metaphor to assert that they didn’t choose the intensity of the suffering they experienced, so they shouldn’t feel shame over a single choice that led to accepting the predicament they now find themselves in. The situation got worse little by little, so they didn’t jump out.

Shoutout to Incubus

I know I first heard about this fable sometime around eighth grade, because when my childhood best friend introduced me to what became our then-favorite song, Warning, I caught the reference right away:

Floating in this cosmic Jacuzzi
We are like frogs oblivious to the water starting to boil
No one flinches, we all float face down

Incubus, Warning

I recently rediscovered this song, and have scream-sung it in honor of my memory of her and us.

I digress.

It goes both ways

The reason I bring this up is because recently, for the first time in over twenty years of hearing this strange little fable, it was brought up to me from a different angle. Yes, we are more likely to succumb to a gentle increase in discomfort and find ourselves suffering more than we would have signed up for.

On the other side of the coin, if we try to overhaul our lives too quickly and make too many abrupt changes at once—regardless of how beneficial—we will jump back into our old ways. Positive change needs to be subtle and incremental, so we can acclimate.

Better Habits, Better Life

I think a lot about habits, systems, and routines because I know it is through structure that I’ll be able to achieve my goals. Looking at this metaphor through this lens very much aligns with the habit stacking method.

Shift Slowly

You didn’t get where you are overnight, and you won’t get where you want to be overnight either.

What small change can you incorporate and make consistent?