Forgive me for the radio silence.

Turns out, my husband’s position is moving to New York. I couldn’t talk about it publicly until some things transpired within his company. Because the impending move was taking up most, if not all, of my brain space during the past few months, I just held back on blogging at all. Full disclosure–it was probably for the best. I was an emotional mess through most of this process.

I spent an embarrassing amount of time looking at potential condos in the city, painstakingly researched public schools, argued against suburban living to my husband countless times while looking up homes in the suburbs (along with train commute times, quality of public schools)  and went through various stages of grief as I mourned the expectations I had for the next few years to come–all before taking a flight there and determining where we would like to live.

Then, we took Tobias to NYC.

We had a great time; don’t get me wrong. Once my heart stopped beating because he walked under someone’s elbows in the Hershey store and was where I couldn’t find him, being a parent to a free range kid in the most crowded city in the nation seemed like a less-than-ideal situation for us. When my romanticized outings to Central Park were shattered by my fears of international human traffickers every.single.time. he was playing out of my sight, I began to realize that though I had focused on teaching my child independence, that would have to be unlearned to suit that city. Parenting is hard enough as it is without going back and trying to undo, or the extra weight of having to lug a child around on public transport for each little errand. I applaud those who get it all done.

In the days that followed, we, along with a rental car-and, at times, a friend as our guide- explored the tri-state area. One day, in Brooklyn, the following, New Jersey: Hoboken, Weehawken, Ridgewood, Montclair, Maplewood, Milburn, Mountain Lakes, Parsippany. The final day led us through Connecticut: Stamford, Westport, Fairfield and Westchester, New York: Hastings-on-Hudson, Dobb’s Ferry.

I abandoned all of the stereotypes that had me reluctant to move to states other than NY or to the suburbs in general, and we took detailed notes on what we saw. At the end of those two days, we agreed what our top three were.

After coming back home, a lot of thought and more thorough research, we decided the beach town of Fairfield, Connecticut would be where we’d find the lifestyle we desire. Last week, we were there for a few days with a realtor, and I might’ve fallen head-over-heels for a house.

No, it’s not New York City, and that type of lifestyle that you imagine comes with it. If we were without kids, it would be a different story. But, this is our story.